We all know the familiar saying, “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”
This is all fine and dandy in the summertime, but who wants lemonade in December? Not me. I want sugar and spice and everything nice. At least that has been my attitude lately. Leave the crummy stuff for the other eleven months out of the year. December is supposed to be this magical month where nothing goes wrong… right?
My little family is in month four of living with my parents, and my husband is in week two of recovering from gum surgery. Our stockings are buried in a storage unit instead of hung by the chimney with care, and my husband is just coming off his steady diet of applesauce with a side of Vicodin. We’d distract ourselves with the house hunt, but for some crazy reason, people don’t seem to list houses around Christmastime.
So, we wait. I miss my “normal” husband. I miss our traditions. I miss our decorations. I miss our space. I was getting ready to dust off my tiny violin and giant box of tissues for a good ol’ fashioned pity party.
Then I read about those of you who are dealing with some seriously heavy issues right now. And I know that for every Christmas Tree Project family, there are thousands of other families who are hurting. Maybe your husband is absent, or your son is deployed. Maybe your baby is sick, or your paychecks are few and far between. Maybe you had to move a loved one into a care home. Ugh. Life can be a beast sometimes.
I am slowly realizing that in my pathetically-pale-by-comparison living situation right now, life is still crazy good. There is a whole lot of love (and noise) in this home. Multi-generational living has definite advantages. October’s applesauce is being put to good use. Presents under someone else’s tree are still meaningful. Stockings are optional. Good things.
Gifts can be given (I am humbled and blown away by the generosity of the FLNW community). Grace can be extended. Laughter can be contagious. Patience can be found. Expectations can be adjusted (Or so I’m told. I’m a s-l-o-w learner on this one, but I’m working on the Gift of Whatever).
Having a tough time? Hang in there. Having a great time? Help those who are hanging on. Lemonade, anyone?
Share your wisdom! How do you celebrate when the going gets tough? What are tangible ways you help those who are hurting?
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Thank you for the perspective!! It has been a hard month, season, year for us too! But at least we have each other, a reliable car, my husband has a job, and we love each other! We will make some serious adjustments in the next few months. Thankfully we do qualify for WIC to help with some food, it will kick in Jan 4th. We have family around us that will help if we need it. But life is not about what we have here on this earth. We need to live for Him and have a heavenward perspective. I need to be reminded of this daily! Thanks for making it real.
Every Christmas is a unique one. Sometimes the best ones are when you are in extraordinary times. The simple things like making cookies together add such richness and warmth to the holidays.
I am thankful to be able to spend another holiday season with my children. My oldest, Anna, is 7, and two years post treatment for leukemia. Madeline ,4, has another 7 months of chemotherapy remaining. They are alive, and that is enough.
I try to remember that there have been and will be many Christmas holidays. Last year, I completed my 5th week of radiation treatment for Lymphoma on Dec. 15th. I had a 1 year old and 2.5 year old, and I was exhausted. Even though they were little, I didn’t want them having memories of a Christmas like that. We had a very low key but very blessed holiday. This year I’m gratefully completely healthy with a 2 and 4 year old, we’ve done a lot-tree, presents, crafts, cooking, lights tours…I think that each year will bring it’s own challenges and blessings. And when they all add up, that will be the childhood memories my kids have. I just want them to remember the love, joy and thankfulness!
Thanks, Emily! I have an idea–why not get your kids some stockings at the Dollar Tree this year? Our Bible Study group just had our kids wrap stocking stuffers and fill stockings for the family we’re adopting so maybe another year (when you’re special stockings are back) you could use the $1 stockings to bless someone else:-)
Merry Christmas!
Very well said! I have a friend who lost her mother last week, and another who’s 11 year daugter has been given 2 weeks to live. I AM BLESSED!
Your right. It’s all to easy to only look at our own situation and ignore everything/everyone else around us. There is a reason for the season (as cliche as it is) and gifts, hustle and bustle, decor is not it. Yes, those things are fun and nice. However, not a requirement to enjoy what we do have. $$$ is tight for most people right now. We are barely above ‘low-income’ standards (seriously, like by $80) therefore we don’t qualify for assistance. Creating a HUGE financial struggle. The hubby & I will not likely exchange gifts this year because of it. However, the kiddos will get the one thing they asked Santa for. But you know what, we will ALL have an amazing time. Why? The love that’s in this house. We have what we NEED. A roof, heat, running water, some food on the table (as meager as it may be) and most importantly, loved ones!!! What more could we want? 🙂
I so relate to this. We’re at least a month behind on all bills and my husband (who lost his job six months ago) just got a drop in unemployment from $1,100 to $800 per month, effective immediately. For four people. $800. In December. At Christmastime. Did I mention our rent is $765? So, we have $35 left for the month for bills and gas money and, well, everything else. SUPER! I was thrilled (and still am) that I just got a part time job, but my bubble was burst a little when I found out that paychecks come monthly and my first one won’t be until January 4th. No paycheck is coming in the nick of time to save us this month. But at some point I just realized that I don’t care. I mean, I CARE… but I don’t care. Stress does nothing to help our situation, and lavish over the top celebrations really are not what our focus should be on anyway. So I too am dealing with the urge to grab my violin and a box of kleenex, but the reality is, we have a tree in our home and stockings by the fire and I bought some presents last month for my kiddos before we knew our money would drop even further (thank goodness!) and my children don’t even notice a difference. And most importantly, we are really focusing on our complete dependence on our Savior this year, Who is the reason we celebrate this entire season and Who is literally sustaining us one day at a time right now. We have food TODAY. We have a home TODAY. We have each other TODAY. And we are told not to worry about tomorrow, so I don’t. Now if only we could get all of the bill collectors to embrace this same carefree attitude… 🙂
My mother died early at age 70, one of only 3 blood relatives I had, on Christmas day 2 years ago. For about 6 months I could barely get out of bed and didn’t care about anything, including money. The IRS audited me at that time because of a clerical error my accountant made. I told him to just give them whatever they wanted (thankfully he didn’t listen to me). What got me through that time was just crying as needed, taking it one day at a time and knowing that eventually things would feel better. I also delved into my spiritual beliefs which, up to that time, I had pretty much ignored. Hang in there!
Julie, sorry for your loss! And to add insult to injury… the IRS. Ouch. One day at a time is so good to remember. Thank you, and I hope this Christmas is full of happy memories just waiting to be made.
This is funny, because I’m the crazy person listing a house two weeks before Christmas. Due to a sudden transfer with my hubby’s work, I’m trying to live in a staged “30-minute ready” home, JUST IN CASE someone were to call and want to see my home. Which, by the way, it seems nobody actually looks for houses this time of year 🙂 So, no tree, no stockings, but lots of love for us this Christmas. Everything else is packed in the garage to make the house look just a little too clean for a family w/ three youngsters actually living in it. In the scheme of things, we have it very good and I feel very blessed. Merry Christmas, and God Bless!
Oh, that is funny! It’s great to hear a positive perspective from the other end. Here’s hoping for lots of house showings!
Wallow and move on, that’s what I do.
According to the government my family is low income. What?!? I never saw ourselves like that. Our bank account may not be rich but our lives are 🙂
Merry Christmas!
Emily, this is so true. I don’t know how many Christmas seasons I have lived through that were more like lemons then gingerbread men and egg nog. But we always sail through knowing the presence of G-D and His amazing love for us. Having a thankful heart and a positive prerspective makes all things better. Here it is almost Christmas (10 days) and I haven’t done any shopping other than a ham for Christmas dinner and yams. Why? Like most people lack of $$$$$, but I am learning as I trust in the L-RD $$$$$$ will come in due time. As long as I can bless my 2 grandchildren that is all that matters to me. It won’t be like last years, but there are never any years that are the same except for the love we have for one another and our love for G-D.
Thank you, it seems when you are going through something, you are all alone, but I know that everyone is having challenges not just my family, thanks for sharing.
Wow! This is lovely and so true. Thank you for sharing this beautiful perspective and reminding me how blessed we really are despite life’s challenges.